June 22, 2026

Life is like a Dream

Everything in my life is so different now... I'm so fucking happy that I got fired from my last job in February. Ever since 2020 my family has convinced me to work in automotive factories to make money. I have worked in 3 different automotive factories since then, my last job being the one I held the longest for almost two years.

I absolutely with all my heart hated working there. The main reason I stayed as long as I did is because that job (at first) was extremely lenient about phones so I would literally just watch youtube videos all fucking day. Those enviornments are extremely dirty, loud and overstimulating, and the most creepy heinous people you'll ever meet especially the men. I had to endure some form of sexual harrasment.

I went back and forth working these types of jobs for a while. Only last year did I have a massive epiphany that I actually have PMDD and many things changed for me when I started using the birth control patch again. In the past when I would try to espcape those factory jobs and work at other places the symptoms from pmdd made it very hard for me to work with teams of people or with the public in normal settings especially at the bakery jobs I tried to do. I still enjoy baking a lot but I don't think I'll ever do it as a job again. I want to save up for some tools and do it as a my own fun hobby.

Anyways I got a new job finally after sufferying financially for a while and I didn't think it was possible for me to be this happy. The job that I have now is something I never thought I'd be able to have ever and never thought was a possibility for me before or something I should strive for, but now that I have it is something so important to me. I don't wanna doxx myself and say where it is but it a retail enviorment and I specifically work in the beauty section with skincare, hair care, and makeup stuff. I have been working my ass off at this job for the past few months and just got promoted to a leadership position and had my work ethic directly complimented by management and the people who trained me. I havent felt this much.......pride.........in a very very long time. I am absolutely filled to the brim with gratitude every single day. Of course retail work can be very tedious and the hours can be long, but when you work with things you really care about it's a very different vibe.

Most of the people at my last job were veeeeeeeeeery conservative were veeeeeeery republican it was giving trailor park boys country bumpkin type vibes fr and for context I grew up on tumblr. Back in my day they used to call girls like me "Social Justice Warriors" lol. Many of the jobs I've worked over the years have forced me to learn many hard lessons and forced me to adapt and compromoise with people I absolutely despise just so I can survive and have shelter and food. My last job really really forced me into that type of survival to an extreme degree. Especially because my mental health was garbage when I first started, so it truly felt like I was stuck and trapped there for so long.

But now I work around many open minded people, queer people, way more people of color, and people on the same level as maturity as me. It's truly so amazing and incredible and so far I have been getting along with pretty much everyone at work. I love making people laugh and smile so much and now I get to do it all the time. Many of my coworkers are also super cute and funny and silly so they also make me laugh super hard and smile all the time too just being themselves. Many of the feminine people I work with are also into super cute things just like me and it's so much fun seeing them putting different charms on their bags and phones, changing their hairstyles, doing their makeup and changing their makeup styles over time. I really love expressing my own free will in various ways and this job has reminded me how much I love seeing other people do it too and genuinely enjoy it.

I really hope my happiness and success will continue~

April 17, 2026

Starting Over

I decided to start my diary over from the beginning... So many things in my life are different now ^.^ New job, new goals, new enviorment. A lot of things are the same tho. This is just my beginning entry, but I am gonna try to use this diary a lot more for brain dump~

pages/mickys room/diary.html